


poetry in motion (an ode to your love)

by Morning_Glory_Skyes



Series: Land, Sea, and Sky [23]
Category: The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild
Genre: Angst, Don't copy to another site, Grief, Hurt No Comfort, I know its been a year since i last updated this series but hi im back :), Kass why do you do this to yourself, M/M, Self-Loathing, but this hurts more so :), i was gonna do the other reacting to kass leaving
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-26
Updated: 2020-09-26
Packaged: 2021-03-08 01:02:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,125
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26667133
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Morning_Glory_Skyes/pseuds/Morning_Glory_Skyes
Summary: It begins when a Rito makes a single, desperate mistake.(It ends with the first step into the darkness, alone.)
Relationships: Kass/Teba/Original Male Character
Series: Land, Sea, and Sky [23]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/690126
Comments: 12
Kudos: 36





	poetry in motion (an ode to your love)

**Author's Note:**

> so yeah, this one is gonna hurt. fair warning in advance. im not sure if i should tag for some things so feel free to let me know if i do need to.

It begins when a Rito makes a single, desperate mistake. Kass can't take much more anyway, he thinks as he slinks through the Zora's Domain under the cover of deep darkness. It's probably three am, the hour when the blood moon was at its peak and covering the land with its rich, red hue. The knowledge of what he's doing, going to do, will do, burns in his lungs but Kass shoulders on without looking back.

He has to do this. It's for their own good. He's not good for them, not the way Muir and Teba seem to slot together so nicely. Like a sword, sliding home into its sheathe. One and the other, with no room for more.

(Kass deliberately ignores that he's slipping into a mindset that's all too familiar to him, back when Teba was full of self-doubt and suicidal thoughts. The mindset they worked so hard to pull him out of.)

The shadows are slowly drawing in as he slips between buildings, hoping to reach the edge of the Domain without being spotted by any of the guards. Kass doesn't really want to explain what he is doing sneaking out. Sneaking away from the Domain instead of doing the reasonable thing and fixing his damn relationship.

Two guards pass by and Kass muffles a swear, slinking further back into the shadows. He's really too damn big to be doing this, towering over the rest of the Zoras by a solid foot and a half, but he doesn't really have a choice if he wants to get out alive. Or in one piece. Sidon had already made it clear what he thought about Kass' little plan and he shudders to think what Revali or Link would do if they found out that he was leaving.

Kass stares upwards at the sky as he picks his way down the path leading to Zora's Domain, beak pressed tightly together in concentration. While the Calamity has long since been defeated, it doesn't mean the roads are safe now. Monsters still roam freely, still attack those they think they can slaughter, but as long as one is competent then it won't be too much of a problem.

At least, that's what Kass hopes. He really would like it if he _didn't_ have to call for help while he's still so close to the Zora's Domain. Sidon did say that he would drag Kass back if he caught sight of him, and the Rito would really rather that didn't happen. It's not like anything good would come of that, anyway.

Maybe by the time Kass can muster his strength to return there, they will have moved on without him. It's better that way.

_(Kass pretends his heart isn't bleeding._

_Slowly, like knives piercing his skin._

_It hurts, but he deserves it, doesn't he?)_

* * *

The roads are empty at this hour, but Kass finds he doesn't care. He plays as he walks, pretends his heart doesn't bleed as he passes a couple on the road, and lets the wind ruffles his feathers. The gems tied into his braids clink together and Kass almost stumbles and chokes on his words. Muir and Teba used to happily braid his feathers, deft fingers combing gently through, and Kass has to cover his mouth as his heart threatens to burst out of his chest.

He's doing the right thing, this is for the better, this is what _he needs._ Kass isn't good for them, the same way a knife sinking into your skin is terrible for your health. Muir and Teba are best together, where Kass can't hurt them with his stupid, selfish desires.

(He loves them in a way that is too much, too strong, too wild and feral and cruel.)

Kass hops lazily over a rock and fixes a smile to his face, beak curving at the edges that is distinctly fake. He's probably radiating anger and self-hatred, a deep sadness that crawls into his bones and chokes his lungs. Kass doesn't know what to do, except let it hurt. He deserves it. Deserves the pain and the anguish and the grief and sadness and everything else that is to come his way.

After all, Kass hurt the two people he loves with all of his heart.

Night falls again, slow and steady, spreading the shroud of reds and oranges and purples across the lands. His voice is hoarse from singing, his hands tired from playing, but he soldiers on until he feels like he can no longer take another step. The shadows deepen and Kass slows to a halt, turning his gaze to the sky to watch the clouds roll by. As gorgeous as they are, all deep blues and grays and blacks, they're nothing against the glistening lights of the sky. Orange rolling over the mountains, red bleeding over the rivers, and yellow glittering at the edge of where the sun has vanished.

Kass just wishes Muir and Teba were here to see it with him. But that would be more than he deserves, wouldn't it.

He heaves a soft sigh and slumps against a nearby tree, sliding down the bark and ignoring the way it catches on his feathers. It's painful, but Kass can't bring himself to care. Or move. He's too damn tired, too damn exhausted, both physically and mentally, and frankly he can barely keep himself above the swirling pool of his own emotions.

Honestly, Kass is kinda surprised he hasn't had a full breakdown yet. Maybe he doesn't even deserve that.

A crackle comes from across him and Kass' head snaps up, eyes locking onto a young Hylian standing across from him, spark rocks in her hands. She smiles at him over the fire she's just built up, and then thumps down to the ground, dropping her pack beside her. "Hi, I hope you don't mind."

Kass, voice stuck in his throat, shakes his head. It takes him several tries to find his voice. "No, not really."

She grins, wide and toothy. "I heard you singing earlier and followed. It was just so pretty. And now you're sitting here, all alone, and really looking like you could use someone to talk to."

"Um. I suppose so."

"Food and a fire is a good start," she says, then idly fishes out a large cooking pot from where it had apparently been slung over her shoulder. "Chicken good for you?"

Kass nods slowly, still bewildered. "Chicken is fine."

"Oh, right, I'm Layla. You're Kass, the wandering songbird, aren't you? I thought I recognized the lyrics you were singing earlier." She brushes the red hair out of her face and grins widely, then parrots a set of lyrics back at him that Kass recognizes. He _had_ sung that song earlier, when he was deeper within the jungle. It does make sense that she'd stay nearby with someone she knows is friendly. Still... there's something off about her.

"Kass," he returns slowly, leaning forward and laying his wings over his knees. "You seem, odd."

Layla sighs and closes her eyes, rubbing a hand over her face. "Yeah, well, I used to be Yiga."

Ah, that will do it. Kass clenches his beak but doesn't say anything.

For a long moment there's nothing but the sounds of Layla chopping vegetables with a sharp knife. She leans forward and dumps them into the pot, listening to the way they sizzle on the bottom. "I used to be Yiga," she repeats, "until I couldn't handle it. I was okay with the adults, those who fought and died in battle. But there's something just so crass and wrong about killing children. Those who can't fight back. Some of the Yiga actually delighted in that, and I couldn't deal with that. So I left. Two weeks later, the champion destroyed the Calamity, and the Yiga fell apart." 

"Good riddance," Kass mutters darkly, thinking about all the times he'd been attacked by them on the roads.

She laughs, gives a nod, and then dumps into the pot enough water to cover everything and starts to clean her tools. "Soup will be up soon."

Another silence, and then Layla turns her gaze to meet Kass' eyes. "You're upset," she says, and it's not a question. Kass can't hide a flinch. "You're very upset. And it's bothering you. It's burning at your lungs and tearing at your chest." She tilts her head to the side and narrows her gaze, piercing red digging tearing through him. "You've lost someone."

"Not lost," Kass wheezes, because he can't even begin to hide this much pain, "just gone."

Layla hums and stirs the soup lazily, staring into the bubbling liquid. "Your fault, then. If it was someone else, there'd be grief and anger, but not quite as much self-loathing."

Kass' beak slams shut and anger vibrates up his spine. It takes everything he has to not snarl at her, but a part of him is aware that she's just trying to help. That if he wants to deal with the problem, he first has to admit there is one. "I did," he manages, and admitting it is like knives in his chest. "I broke it, I ruined it, I was the reason wh--"

He cuts off when he's hit in the face with an apple, and Kass' hands fly up to clutch at his now smarting beak. The apple rolls into the dust and she snatches it up, stuffing it back into her bag. "Ow!" Kass yelps, rubbing at the bruise.

"Stop that," Layla says flatly. "If it was your fault, then why in the Calamity's name are you out here sulking, instead of being with them and talking?"

"Because I tried that, and it didn't work!" Kass hisses, feathers fluffing up. Layla raises a single brow, slowly, and Kass can't help but wilt underneath her stare. If he's being entirely honest, maybe he _didn't_ stay and talk with them as much as he should have. She sighs and then pulls two bowls out of her bag, slowly dishing out their meal.

"Then if it didn't work, maybe you're not supposed to be," Layla murmurs softly, reaching to hand Kass a bowl. He takes it numbly and slumps down, staring at the floating chunks of carrots that are breaching the surface of the broth. He doesn't want to admit that he's constantly thinking about that, about what went wrong, about how he can't can't _can't_ fix it. It's his fault, and therefore he must suffer for it.

A chunk of carrot hits his beak and Kass can't stop the full body jerk, eyes flying up to see Layla frowning at him. "Stop that," she says firmly. "If you're this hung up, this caught on your own grief and self-loathing, then you need to go back and talk. It's clearly still affecting you, and I don't think you'll get over it by hiding. All you'll be doing is jumping at your shadow at every turn."

"I made it so clear I didn't want to talk to them," he whispers, miserably. He hates that someone else was able to judge him so easily, see the way he's all tangled and torn up inside. That someone else was able to do the one thing he wasn't able to do. To look at the situation and tell him to stop being so dumb.

Layla sighs. "The thing is, you're willing to try and fix it. But you have to talk to them. That's it, that's the thing. There's no spells or love potions or any magic bullshit to fix it and make it better. You're the one who has to talk. If you made it clear that you didn't want to talk, then they're going to respect your wishes and stay away. Even if you really don't want that." She tilts her bowl upwards and drains the broth at the bottom, thumping it down with a happy noise. "They can't read your mind, so you have to communicate. Now eat your damn soup."

Kass tilts the bowl upwards and mouths at the chunks floating in it with his beak. It's awkward, the bowls not being made with Rito in mind, but he manages without spilling too much. It's good, warm and filling, and Kass finds himself calming with food now in his stomach. "I think," he says, and the words are heavy, damning in his mouth, "I want to travel a little more. Think about it."

The _look_ Layla gives him says she doesn't believe a goddamn word, but she doesn't say anything.

_(Kass turns away, and swallows the bitter bile in his throat._

_He doesn't know if he will return to the Domain._

_Running from his problems is something he's good at.)_


End file.
